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It’s Time! And, Is There Something That Might Be Holding You Back Just a Little, too?

For those of you who know me personally, you know that I struggle big time with CLUTTER! Books, journals, pens, just STUFF. And you will also agree that I struggle with getting rid of my clothes that no longer fit. I guess for a while, I was afraid the weight my gradually creep back as it always has before. I didn’t know this, but there really is such a thing as your mind taking time to catch up with your current weight and shape – I had been a size 18 for so long that sometimes I still see myself as that. Again, THERE IS NOTHING wrong with being a size 18 if you are happy there. I was not because I was not healthy at that weight and size.  It wasn’t the number that bothered me, it was how uncomfortable and tired I was.

CONFESSION:

Even as my weight has been coming down over the past year, I’ve been wearing my old clothes. I HATE shopping, and I used the excuse that I wanted to reach my goal first (inside thinking well I will be prepared if it comes back, as usual). I think every single one of us who has struggled with health and wellness has been through the “losing the same 10 pounds 100 times” cycle.

A friend of mine from the gym took me shopping a few months ago just to help me find a couple of outfits so I could be seen in public at social events (which I am doing my level best to learn to enjoy!). So I had that, and then of course workout clothes because I’m at the gym twice a day. And I am the QUEEN of online shopping for great deals on workout clothes, believe that! The gym has been the one place I felt confident enough to quit hiding finally. That took a LONG time.

WHY NOW?

I took a few days off of work to enjoy the long holiday weekend, and my staycation project is to bag up all of my clothes that no longer fit and get them ready to give away. IT IS TIME. Might sound kind of silly – why is it such a big deal, why haven’t I done it already, you might not even understand why I’m writing about it. It all goes back to accepting that I am in a MUCH better place emotionally and physically now than I honestly ever have been.

I can let go of the clothes I used to hide under because I’m not ashamed anymore. It is NOT just about the amount of weight lost – my whole transformation story is most importantly about how emotionally and mentally I am so much stronger because I took that first step, and I kept going, and now I’m letting nothing keep me from my goals and dreams.  Not until I surrounded myself with positive people who believed in me and encouraged me, and even challenged me to live outside of my comfort zone was I able to start to change.  I just couldn’t do it alone, and it’s perfectly ok to admit that sometimes we’re in over our heads.  I think that takes real strength – admitting you need help and then getting it.

MAKING ROOM FOR REAL HAPPINESS:

This isn’t just about goals in the gym or on the scale.  Going through this transformation has given me the confidence to pick up this blog again on a regular basis, and to take some writing classes online so that I can deliver better content to my precious readers who are kind enough to give me a few minutes of their time to read my posts.  I am getting my confidence back and I no longer have that ugly dark cloud following me everywhere.  Depression is serious, and I am so very thankful that my journey up to this point has helped me get mine under control.  Now I can genuinely enjoy making people laugh instead of using humor as a crutch, to keep people from noticing the me that I really didn’t like.

Once this project is finished, I might not have many clothes left but that’s ok.  I need to clean out that old part of my life to make room for the amazing new part!  I share this because maybe someone else out there is holding onto something from the past that could be keeping you from being as happy as you can possible be.  Let’s do this together!  Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.

2 Comments

  1. Sandeen Sandeen

    I love closet cleaning. Like you though, I suffer through clutter, which is never good. I have issues with letting things go, but over time I have surpassed that. As I got much older in life, I have been able to try to control the clutter, tidy and organize. I realize that when I don’t clean out stuff (books, magazines, clothes, etc.,) things feel out of sorts of me around the house. If things aren’t organized or tidy around the house, I will freak out. Maybe it’s the perfectionist in me.

    Anyway, every three months I try and go through all of my clothes. I grew up going to private school my whole life, so I lived in uniforms. My clothes were picked out everyday because it was generally the same outfit (different accessories). I could live in jeans and tee-shirts all the time if I wanted to but had no sense of what else to wear outside of that (hence being in a private school the whole time). My mom, Ann, had the fashion sense but I never picked up on all the bright colored outfits she would wear. I would just stick to neutrals because they go with everything. What helps me figure out what to wear on a daily basis is a ton of fashion books. I have a ton of them and websites, too, that give me outfit ideas. I have received the most complements on outfits from ideas I just picked out of a book. However, I learned what I looked good in too, given the shape of my body. By realizing what I could wear, and how I looked, that made a world of a difference not only to myself but to others. I learned from my parents, that I am representative of the family and how I dress and act is how people are going to perceive me and treat me. It is how you attract others to you, as well.

    I buy everything on clearance, because I know that one day, it’s going to get donated as I lose weight (and hopefully not gain weight). So a few tips that helped me out…

    1. Figure out what your capsule wardrobe should be. These items are the items you will live off of so you can create additional outfits off of them. Look on pintrest for capsule wardrobes. (You can have capsule wardrobes for winter, spring, summer and fall)

    2. I buy all of my workout clothes at Macy’s on clearance and only Material Girl (occasionally some other brands). Eventually all of gym clothes get warn down that I just replace them with new clearance items.

    3. Stick with brands that work for you. I stick with a lot of them and not just with clothes, but with accessories, shoes, food, etc. That also includes my bath and beauty routine products too.

    4. Make Clothes Mentor your best friend. There are two locations in Charlotte. One at the Arboretum and the other is at S. Kings Drive. Take all of your like new clothes (they go up to a size 30), drop off at a location, and they will buy your items. You get to make extra money on the side, too. If they don’t take it, you can donate it to them. Keep the receipt for tax purposes.

    5. Make Goodwill your best friend, too for donations. Save the receipts so you can claim them on your tax return.

    These are just some ideas. However, once you get the hang of de-cluttering, you will see that everything will get better and you will feel a lot better about everything too 🙂

    P.S.-Getting organization books never hurts anyone 😉 (Including me of course)

  2. Pam -- the other half of "Pam squared" Pam -- the other half of "Pam squared"

    Relating on many levels. Looking forward to the next chapter!

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