Hello lovelies! I have really missed you all. I have to confess something – I completely lost sight of WHAT I do while I was trying to learn how to do it better. I’ve been so busy studying about writing, blogging, working on creating a business (SPORTS VIXEN), that I totally put aside the actual writing itself, which is what I love to do.
My dear friend @CreativeGalina sent me a note with my “LIFER” necklace that brought tears (happy tears) to my eyes – she reminded me to focus and do what I LOVE and the rest will come. If I don’t write, nothing else I’m trying to accomplish can possibly take place. Pretty simple concept, but I lost it along the way – too busy learning and not busy enough “doing.”
I had even put my journal away, and we all know that’s my therapy (along with my new workouts), so I am bringing everything back to ONE. Write write write – and be happy! All the coursework and reading I’ve been doing has to compliment that, not detract from it. I was getting so completely freaked out that I was paralyzed what to do next. Galina put it best “just write – nothing else happens if you don’t do that.”
This might be a lengthy post because I’ve been away but I have so much to share now that she reminded me that this is what I do. I don’t know if anyone gets anything out of my posts but if one person does, then I’m doing something good. And just maybe it’s enough if that one person is me 🙂
Update on my new training: I absolutely could not be any happier to be part of the Team Hardbody Fitness personal training. The environment is perfect for my transformation! No judgement zone, just GET TO WORK! No mercy, because my trainer knows I can do it. My mind was getting in the way. I cannot explain how much my life has improved in the month that I’ve been training there. I arrive with a smile because I know I’m doing something good, and I leave completely drenched and spent, but also smiling because I DID IT!.
I finally feel like I can have fitness goals again, and with this team pushing me, I believe I have a shot at making them happen. My MIND had to be ready in order to push my body. It took far too long to get my head back in the game but it’s there. And guess what? My depression is in the background, I don’t live under that black cloud 24/7 anymore. I have moments still, but they’ve taught me that everyone’s goals are important, and it’s time to work my ass off to get where I wanna go – because I am capable. The only thing that was stopping me before was me. Now I just trust the process and execute. I still have a LONG LONG way to go getting the meals right, getting all the cardio in – but trust and believe this is huge progress. My self confidence is returning, I don’t want to hide from the world anymore. Thanks Terry and Cara, Vinson and Ty for welcoming me and making me feel just as important as your elite athletes.
Michael Anders – Thank you for giving me the foundation and the push to first get my head together, then figure out what it is that I wanted to do in terms of fitness. I was completely a total mess and all over the place trying to find an identity – what was my label? I know that had to be SO annoying – I was more worried about the label that doing the work 🙂
My transformation is in full swing – physically and mentally. I am a work in progress, beautifully and wonderfully flawed, but I am progressing. It’s because I have amazing people in my life beside me, believing in me, and they see my vision and remind me when I lose sight of it.
Let me stop now before you get bored. Just remember – there is no better time to believe in you than RIGHT NOW. That thing, that one thing you keep saying “I would love to do….”, or “would’t it be great to try….” – give it your best shot. There will be bumps, there will be bruises and setbacks but if it matters to you, nothing can stop you.
Have a wonderfully awesome day, and STAY PAWSITIVE!